Step 1: Have the "should we go" conversation
Before you search, sit down together for fifteen minutes. Each of you names one thing you hope changes and one thing you are nervous about. You do not have to agree on everything. You only need to agree that you will both try a few sessions. If one partner is not ready, the other can still start individually and invite the partner later.
Step 2: Decide what kind of schedule you can keep
Look at both calendars for a typical month. Is there one evening or a weekend morning that both of you can protect? Will you be driving from the same place or from two jobs across town? Settle this first; it narrows your search more than anything else and saves you from booking someone you cannot reach regularly.
Step 3: Search the directory and build a short list
Use the directory to find independent counselors in and around Tallahassee. Note three or four who list couples work, offer times close to the ones you picked in Step 2, and either sit near one of your workplaces or offer video. The directory does not screen or rank counselors, so treat the list as a starting point.
Step 4: Look up each license with the state
Florida's Board of Clinical Social Work, Marriage & Family Therapy and Mental Health Counseling oversees LMFTs, LMHCs and LCSWs, and the board links to the Department of Health's public license search. For each name on your list, run that search. Check that the license type matches what the counselor's own listing says and that the status shows current. Cross off anyone you cannot find.
Step 5: Make the first call together
Put the phone on speaker or join a video call as a pair. Ask:
- How do you structure a first session with a couple?
- How often do you usually meet, and for how long?
- What is your cancellation policy, and what are the fees?
- Do you ever see partners separately, and how do you keep that fair?
Pay attention to whether both of you got a chance to talk and felt heard.
Step 6: If you have an open family case, sort the two tracks
Some Tallahassee couples start counseling while a family case is active in Leon County. If that is you, keep the tracks separate in your head. The Second Judicial Circuit's mediation FAQ says its ADR Unit mediates many county civil and family cases, that judges or magistrates may refer family cases to mediation, and that referrals go to the unit at 301 South Monroe Street. A mediator helps with agreements in the case; your counselor works on the relationship.
For paperwork questions, the Leon County Clerk's Self Help Center says it assists only with family law (excluding restraining orders), small claims and residential evictions, at clerk locations including the courthouse, the Northeast Branch and the Government Annex. Ask your attorney or the court, not your counselor, about anything that affects the case.
Step 7: Agree on how you will handle video sessions
If either of you travels, works late, or lives part of the week elsewhere, ask the counselor early whether video is an option and how it works for couples. Some prefer both partners in one room facing the same screen; others are comfortable with two separate logins. Test the connection before the first session so the hour is not spent on audio problems.
Step 8: Book three sessions and set a check-in
Rather than deciding after one meeting, book the first three. After the third, talk with each other at home: Is the counselor fair to both of us? Are we talking about the things we came for? Is the schedule holding? Share your answers with the counselor at the next session.
Step 9: Protect the time between sessions
Many couples find the days between appointments matter as much as the hour itself. Agree on when you will talk about what came up, and when you will give it a rest. If the counselor suggests an exercise, put it on the shared calendar.
Step 10: Revisit the fit honestly
If after several sessions one of you still feels the counselor leans toward the other partner, say so in the room. A good counselor can hear that. If it does not change, go back to your list from Step 3 and try another name. Switching is common and does not mean you failed.